I may be insane but at least I'm not mad  - but has anyone considered using a U-Boat?  I've found this documentary video (see link below). The people involved look really scared, have beards, and are in dire need of daylight, so must therefore must be cavers. Various sumps seem to be crossed on the previous documented journey and perhaps rival cave owners who don't want added 'wow' factors on such a link are perhaps seen to be throwing awkward things into the mix to disrupt the journey.
Given the Wookey cheese factor an incentive could be to diversify from normal Cheddar in as much that (according to revered sources) for example it could be that the following is used: "German Cheese: Allg?uer Bergk?se ? Prepared in Allg?u from unpasteurized cow's milk, it is ripened for a minimum of four months and has a smooth texture." Wookey would be the perfect place for that to happen.
The alternative is lots of digging over many years with a small spoon.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlwqOVnXuc4

Closer to reality than you might think!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speleonaut

Will it have a cheese carrying capacity ?

Will it have a cheese carrying capacity ?

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Yes, it's a well known fact that the impact velocity of a well aimed lump of proper mature Mendip Cheddar surpasses that of Camembert, (and yet people still use Hiltis). Coupled with superior German technology the AllGau-Cheddar squeeze destroyer will surpass all. 

Must admit I prefer the original Klaus Doldinger version.

I remember when that film was first screened on British TV, as a series of (I think) six episodes. I don't watch much telly but I just happened to see the first one of the series. I was rivetted to the screen. I think it's the only time I've ever made absolutely sure I watched every single episode of something on TV. Since then I've read a lot about the WW2 U boats. 75% of the German submariners perished in the war; they were very much the enemy but I find it difficult to avoid having full respect for those men. They followed orders bravely, in a war that was not of their making. If anyone's never seen the film, I can highly recommend it.

Pitlamp said:

Must admit I prefer the original Klaus Doldinger version.

I remember when that film was first screened on British TV, as a series of (I think) six episodes. I don't watch much telly but I just happened to see the first one of the series. I was rivetted to the screen. I think it's the only time I've ever made absolutely sure I watched every single episode of something on TV. Since then I've read a lot about the WW2 U boats. 75% of the German submariners perished in the war; they were very much the enemy but I find it difficult to avoid having full respect for those men. They followed orders bravely, in a war that was not of their making. If anyone's never seen the film, I can highly recommend it.

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If you can find a copy, read Peter-Erich Cremers U333. It's a memoir of his time as a U-Boat captain, it's a must if you found Das Boot fascinating.

shotlighter said:

Pitlamp said:

Must admit I prefer the original Klaus Doldinger version.

I remember when that film was first screened on British TV, as a series of (I think) six episodes. I don't watch much telly but I just happened to see the first one of the series. I was rivetted to the screen. I think it's the only time I've ever made absolutely sure I watched every single episode of something on TV. Since then I've read a lot about the WW2 U boats. 75% of the German submariners perished in the war; they were very much the enemy but I find it difficult to avoid having full respect for those men. They followed orders bravely, in a war that was not of their making. If anyone's never seen the film, I can highly recommend it.

Click to expand...

If you can find a copy, read Peter-Erich Cremers U333. It's a memoir of his time as a U-Boat captain, it's a must if you found Das Boot fascinating.

Click to expand...

I'll have to look out for that one. I read 'Das Boot' (english translation) years ago while on holiday after buying it at the airport and couldn't put it down.

shotlighter said:

Pitlamp said:

Must admit I prefer the original Klaus Doldinger version.

I remember when that film was first screened on British TV, as a series of (I think) six episodes. I don't watch much telly but I just happened to see the first one of the series. I was rivetted to the screen. I think it's the only time I've ever made absolutely sure I watched every single episode of something on TV. Since then I've read a lot about the WW2 U boats. 75% of the German submariners perished in the war; they were very much the enemy but I find it difficult to avoid having full respect for those men. They followed orders bravely, in a war that was not of their making. If anyone's never seen the film, I can highly recommend it.

Click to expand...

If you can find a copy, read Peter-Erich Cremers U333. It's a memoir of his time as a U-Boat captain, it's a must if you found Das Boot fascinating.

Click to expand...

Thank you, I'll make a note of that.

Just done a little Googling. The resource below refers to two books he wrote:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter-Erich_Cremer

There is a new series continuing from where the original finished:
https://variety.com/2018/tv/news/first-look-das-boot-1202704646/

Mike

Pitlamp said:

Just done a little Googling. The resource below refers to two books he wrote:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter-Erich_Cremer

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I believe that U Boat Commander is essentially an update to U333, though I have only read U333.

Must admit I prefer the original Klaus Doldinger version.

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Actually, couldn't agree more - to me one of the best and most apt soundtracks composed, OP was looking for something that could be conveyed in a few minutes. Defo one of the best things worth watching, once started you can't put it down.

There's an acapella  version. Well sort of. It's not quite Only You by the Flying Pickets. Seems to be a bit muckd around with, but nice nevertheless.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kp4zjbmoI40