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  1. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    A man goes in for an interview for a job as a TV news broadcaster. The interview went quite well but the trouble was he kept winking and stammering. The interviewer said, “Although you have a lot of the qualities we’re looking for, the fact that you keep winking and stammering disqualifies you.”...
  2. tony from suffolk

    Graphite Mining

    Ian ran the excellent mining museum in Keswick, but once his wife died he lost heart & finally retired. A great shame, he was a top source of information on mining in the Lake District and wrote many excellent books on the subject.
  3. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    A true story - Lt. Colonel Robert Maclaren retired from the British Army in 2001 after a long fulfilling career. On the day he retired he received a letter from the Personnel Department of the Ministry of Defence setting out details of his pension and, in particular, the tax-free ‘lump sum’...
  4. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    They have signs in hospital car parks which say, "Thieves Operate Here" Personally, I'd feel a lot safer with a surgeon.
  5. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    My wife said: "That's the 4th time you've gone back for dessert! Doesn't it embarrass you?" I said: "No, I keep telling them it's for you."
  6. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    You know you're old if you remember when fame was a byproduct of talent.
  7. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    I think I've hit the Jackpot at the local boot fair. l've bought an old coffee table for 10 quid & I'm sure it was made by Van Gogh. I know this because there's a bit of vaneer missing.
  8. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    Some of the old favourite singers and bands have re-released their greatest hits with new titles and lyrics to accommodate their ageing audience. Some examples: Herman’s Hermits: “Mrs. Brown You’ve Got a Lovely Walker” The Rolling Stones: “You Can’t Always Pee When You Want” Credence Clearwater...
  9. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    I found my first grey pubic hair today. Normally things like that don’t bother me, but it was in my Big Mac.
  10. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    I have found marriage to be very educational. For instance, I had no idea there was a wrong way to put milk in the fridge.
  11. tony from suffolk

    RIP Dave Myers...........Hairy Biker

    Very sad. He always came across as a very normal, nice man, and he'll be very much missed by millions.
  12. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    The next time you dislike your life remember, it's all about perspective. I have a friend who has the time to read two books a week, works out twice a day, has no financial worries, and has lots of people wanting to have sex with him. And yet he constantly complains about how much he hates prison.
  13. tony from suffolk

    A new cave on Mendips - The Last White Rabbit Hole (Tuska's Last)

    I've been avidly following progress via the Blog, and I commend you folks for your persistence and enthusiasm! That last video looks very promising…Onward and downward; I'm with you in spirit.
  14. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    The Nigerian football team were so disappointed with Saturday’s performance that they have said they will personally refund all expenses to fans who travelled to support them. All they need to do is send bank details, sort codes and PINs, & they will transfer the money directly…
  15. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    I hate that feeling after surgery when you're not sure if you're awake or asleep. Or even if you operated on the right patient.
  16. tony from suffolk

    Very silly pics

  17. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    “Anyway doctor, I applied the haemorrhoid cream and got a nasty reaction”. “Where did you apply it?” “On the bus.”
  18. tony from suffolk

    Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

    Next time your wife gets angry, drape a towel round her shoulders like a cape & say “Now you're super-angry!” She'll calm right down.
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