Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

[Mrs Trellis]

Only 44 more wrongly released prisoners to go until Christmas.

 

[Mrs Trellis]

 

[oldfart]

https://www.kleinbottle.com/

Just found this.





A mathematician named Klein
Thought the Möbius band was divine.
Said he: "If you glue
The edges of two,
You'll get a weird bottle like mine."

 

[Mrs Trellis]

 

[Mrs Trellis]

 

[alanw]

My brother's "Imaginary Toolstore" website. Unchanged in decades.

 

[Brains]

My brother's "Imaginary Toolstore" website. Unchanged in decades.

I actually have a sky hook, safe in a box where it can't hurt me. Even used it as a psychological runner one scary day

Probably with my step in crampons, plastic boots, technical axes and dead man belay... Caving is so much better than climbing

 

[Mrs Trellis]

 

[tony from suffolk]

Washing machine manufacturers! Ensure the final minute of each washing cycle lasts for at least half an hour.

 

[TheBitterEnd]

I'm really into writing short fiction

...

mainly to do lists

 

[TheBitterEnd]

NASA is launching a satellite to say sorry to the Aliens.

They're calling it Apollo G

 

[hyweldavies]

Washing machine manufacturers! Ensure the final minute of each washing cycle lasts for at least half an hour.

I think they buy their timers from Suunto's diving division

 

[hoehlenforscher]

With all this stormy weather I am a bit worried about the caravan on the drive.

We don't own one and it wasn't there earlier!

 

[Mrs Trellis]

Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother,
"Frankie Brown showed me his willie today in the playground!"
Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut."
Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's mum asked, "Really small, was it?"
Sally replied, "No, salty."

 

[tony from suffolk]

I've got one of those Smart showers when you can tell if someone's filling the kettle downstairs.

 

[tony from suffolk]

A little old lady is walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags rips, and every once in a while a £20 note falls out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her, and says, ‘Ma’am, there are £20 notes falling out of your bag.’

‘Oh, really? Blast!”says the little old lady. ‘I’d better go back, and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me.’

‘Well, now, not so fast,’ says the cop. ‘How did you get all that money? You didn’t steal it, did you?’

‘Oh, no’, says the little old lady. ‘You see, my back yard is right next to the football stadium parking lot. On game days, a lot of fans come and pee through the fence into my flower garden. So, I stand behind the fence with my hedge clippers. Each time some guy sticks his thing through the fence, I say, ‘£20 or off it comes.’

‘Well, that seems only fair.’ laughs the cop. ‘OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what’s in the other bag?’

‘Well, you know’, says the little old lady, ‘not everybody pays.’

 

[TheBitterEnd]

 

[RobinGriffiths]

That's skeuomorphism for you!

 

[pwhole]

Damn, I just gave away my age.

 

[ChrisJC]

https://www.kleinbottle.com/

Just to be pedantic - they are not Klein Bottles. They are a projection into 3D space of a 4 dimensional shape. In the same way that a 2D shadow is not the same as the original item causing the shadow.

But I don't think we have a pedants corner any more.

Chris.