Before I start;
Unless you are one of the posters with more in their 'signiture' than their real life, and want to postulate that I have indeed already started... well I am just about to ..
Ready?
Gather round boys and girls and try not to judge an old fool or two,or three (sorry Clive :-[ )
On a braw, bricht tho really quite breezy after-breakfast (actually, bloody nigh midday, after much procrastination, on the part of T' cave & craggers, whom the mighty and esteemed Zomjon and I awaited at the Knotlow triangle.)
Really. not long now. Just a wee background info needed to help you fully understand the dynamic of the group. and the planned objective of the trip.
Assembled(belatedly)
Organ-grinder - Steve SRT crawler and water proficient.
Ex pres' c&c - Clive Ditto & photographer par-exelance.
Expert and croll-fiddler - Zomjon the mighty. Need i say more?
Member ( :tease: ) - Dave Jon's stalker for many years, across many counties
Coiffure adviser -Gabby Apparently not well instructed as Jon and I assumed.
willing victim - Steve# Ditto, but great with pudding.
Moi -Je suis Charlie O.G. SRT squirming and occasional deep wading bod
The mission?
Steves' orgised sortie with club and new recruits ( I hate the term Newbies, so I shan't be so condesending.) for our ammusement.and edification.
The objective;
In-stu SRT instruction and mud therapy. & Mmmmmmmmmmmmeccano A stout and true few would enter Hillocks via the bin entrance,wiggle down a bit then (Ahem ) glide though a slightly damp coffin level, an' jus' pop down to the others. Pips eh? :kiss2:
The mighty, well assembled Zomjon and his idiot co-caver would bob down the climber route with our excited and willing victims.to a subterrainean classique system.
So without more ado...
We alledged experts began to kit-up, my ever shrinking warmback, true to form pinched out any slight possibility of a comfortable scrotum for the rest of the excursion, lest I should experience 'cyclists numb-knackeritis' as my not inconsiderable weight, ( technically Mass in S.I. terms.) would be brought to bear on such, when 'on-rope'.
T' Mighty wellie-less Zomjon loaned a pair from a passing wellie pusher. ( we were in deep Derbyshire farming country after all.)
whilst I Fitted Steve# with requisite harness( non-bondage spec') and a bewildering array of shiny, clinky clinky stuff, to aid his descent and prussic back to reality.
T' Mighty Zomjon (without foot-loops) demonstrated the inginuity of 'The Caver' by fabricating a new set from local hedgerow foraging.
To The Wood!!
I demonstrated how to 'clip-in' to a loop T' Mighty Zomjon was still tying to the eye, and bar across the entrance shaft. We took a willing 'student de speliologie' each to demonstrate / instruct safe practice ( bring it on pendants!)
to cut a long law-suit short we shepherded our charges safely and comfortably, (woo-hoo! numb-knackeritis. Sweet.) to sub-terra firma.
I was assaulted by an accelerating two squares of chocolate-type confectionary TM. but let it pass as mere exuberance. Gabby.
when we were all assembled and free of our clinky clinky stuff, harnesses and dignity, on the part of my scrotum, we headed forth to meet that small band of cave&craggers on the more moist route in.
Oh! how they laughed in the face of dampness; warriers each, to a man.
We stood with child-like awe as Steve Clive and a stalker regaled tales of a slipery bit on the way down. (shan't mention going the wrong way Steve.)
We had a great mooch about via the famous 'hanging' coffin level noting mineralisation fossil form and variety in petrology, and bat poo! briefly discussing each to aid a fuller understanding of the system for the newbies(whoops!)
Photo's with and without back passage illumination, poses camio and dynamic were taken by Clive,hopefully he will add later if they meet his approval.
To be. or not to be;
F#kin wet through and stiff from a lovely crawl, is the question T' Mighty Zomjon put to all.
Whoooosh like a scalded cat I found myself at the back of the party, with great words of encouragement and knowledge.
T' Mighty and now all but strutting Zomjon led to who knew where;
Mmmmmmmmmeccano. mmmmm nice.
Steve, Gabby, Steve#,Dave took a pragmatic and counter-stalking stance (recumbant actually)as Clive warily set awy towards Knottlow, a reluctant nerk followed despite an owd weary tho finely tuned body. " Oy thats my foot" rang back to where i was demonstrating 'the languid leopard crawl' to anyone that might have been watching.
Oh! frabjous day callooh callay.... Clivebottled it turned back. being a polite sort of chap I made room for his retreat, by beating him to it.
Dave had returned to main passage before the both of us .
A photo-shoot followed. especially focusing on a spectacular Breccia / calcified boulder.
The time passed. I searched for owt of interest.
After a week or so we heard the emboldened recruits and t'others and welcomed them to our picnic. a shared s##ckers or wotevva.
Tales of great heroism and daring-do and a soggy bit, twice travelled, made me wish I had too taken the route of the valiant.
I got over it.
T' mighty Zomjon and I seemed to simultaneously reach an apiphany moment of near biblical scale!!
It's surely pub-o/clock.
"D Na Na Na Na Na Na Na..."
D Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Pub Time!
To the bat rope Zomjon!
Meanwhile.....
Super- Steve, Clive-man and Stalking- Dave took to their heels and shot towards the Hillocks bin. via a marvalously moist wee coffin level, and the slippery bit.
Cut To the climber shaft / route.
Disclaimer:
Full instuction was glibly brushed over as we were rushing to the pub! :read:
The first time ever you climbed a rope,
I thought the sun shone in your eyes. but it seemed to be the reflection of my lamp on your fear- stained face, Steve#
I waited at the first re-belay to check technique etc'. then magically obviscate the next bit for legal reasons, not least T' croll fiddling Mighty Zomjons heroic exploits.
Suffice to say; nay praise Steve# and Gabby on a safe well managed first ascent via shiny clinky clinky things on rope.
De-rigged by T'Zomjon his self. sterling work that man.
The tale of straining custard through a brand new set of dreadlocks to sate Steves' picky picky Apple-crumble fetish is a tale for another day, and not for the faint-hearted, I do declare!
All's well that ends well eh? Easyrider by Kelham Brewery Nuff Said?
O. G.
Unless you are one of the posters with more in their 'signiture' than their real life, and want to postulate that I have indeed already started... well I am just about to ..
Ready?
Gather round boys and girls and try not to judge an old fool or two,or three (sorry Clive :-[ )
On a braw, bricht tho really quite breezy after-breakfast (actually, bloody nigh midday, after much procrastination, on the part of T' cave & craggers, whom the mighty and esteemed Zomjon and I awaited at the Knotlow triangle.)
Really. not long now. Just a wee background info needed to help you fully understand the dynamic of the group. and the planned objective of the trip.
Assembled(belatedly)
Organ-grinder - Steve SRT crawler and water proficient.
Ex pres' c&c - Clive Ditto & photographer par-exelance.
Expert and croll-fiddler - Zomjon the mighty. Need i say more?
Member ( :tease: ) - Dave
Jon's stalker for many years, across many countiesCoiffure adviser -Gabby Apparently not well instructed as Jon and I assumed.
willing victim - Steve# Ditto, but great with pudding.
Moi -Je suis Charlie O.G. SRT squirming and occasional deep wading bod
The mission?
Steves' orgised sortie with club and new recruits ( I hate the term Newbies, so I shan't be so condesending.) for our ammusement.and edification.
The objective;
In-stu SRT instruction and mud therapy. & Mmmmmmmmmmmmeccano
A stout and true few would enter Hillocks via the bin entrance,wiggle down a bit then (Ahem ) glide though a slightly damp coffin level, an' jus' pop down to the others. Pips eh? :kiss2:The mighty, well assembled Zomjon and his idiot co-caver would bob down the climber route with our excited and willing victims.to a subterrainean classique system.
So without more ado...
We alledged experts began to kit-up, my ever shrinking warmback, true to form pinched out any slight possibility of a comfortable scrotum for the rest of the excursion, lest I should experience 'cyclists numb-knackeritis' as my not inconsiderable weight, ( technically Mass in S.I. terms.) would be brought to bear on such, when 'on-rope'.
T' Mighty wellie-less Zomjon loaned a pair from a passing wellie pusher. ( we were in deep Derbyshire farming country after all.)
whilst I Fitted Steve# with requisite harness( non-bondage spec') and a bewildering array of shiny, clinky clinky stuff, to aid his descent and prussic back to reality.
T' Mighty Zomjon (without foot-loops) demonstrated the inginuity of 'The Caver' by fabricating a new set from local hedgerow foraging.
To The Wood!!
I demonstrated how to 'clip-in' to a loop T' Mighty Zomjon was still tying to the eye, and bar across the entrance shaft. We took a willing 'student de speliologie' each to demonstrate / instruct safe practice ( bring it on pendants!)
to cut a long law-suit short we shepherded our charges safely and comfortably, (woo-hoo! numb-knackeritis. Sweet.) to sub-terra firma.
I was assaulted by an accelerating two squares of chocolate-type confectionary TM. but let it pass as mere exuberance. Gabby.
when we were all assembled and free of our clinky clinky stuff, harnesses and dignity, on the part of my scrotum, we headed forth to meet that small band of cave&craggers on the more moist route in.
Oh! how they laughed in the face of dampness; warriers each, to a man.
We stood with child-like awe as Steve Clive and a stalker regaled tales of a slipery bit on the way down. (shan't mention going the wrong way Steve.)
We had a great mooch about via the famous 'hanging' coffin level noting mineralisation fossil form and variety in petrology, and bat poo! briefly discussing each to aid a fuller understanding of the system for the newbies(whoops!)
Photo's with and without back passage illumination, poses camio and dynamic were taken by Clive,hopefully he will add later if they meet his approval.
To be. or not to be;
F#kin wet through and stiff from a lovely crawl, is the question T' Mighty Zomjon put to all.
Whoooosh like a scalded cat I found myself at the back of the party, with great words of encouragement and knowledge.
T' Mighty and now all but strutting Zomjon led to who knew where;
Mmmmmmmmmeccano. mmmmm nice.
Steve, Gabby, Steve#,Dave took a pragmatic and counter-stalking stance (recumbant actually)as Clive warily set awy towards Knottlow, a reluctant nerk followed despite an owd weary tho finely tuned body. " Oy thats my foot" rang back to where i was demonstrating 'the languid leopard crawl' to anyone that might have been watching.
Oh! frabjous day callooh callay.... Clive
Dave had returned to main passage before the both of us
.A photo-shoot followed. especially focusing on a spectacular Breccia / calcified boulder.
The time passed. I searched for owt of interest.
After a week or so we heard the emboldened recruits and t'others and welcomed them to our picnic. a shared s##ckers or wotevva.
Tales of great heroism and daring-do and a soggy bit, twice travelled, made me wish I had too taken the route of the valiant.
I got over it.
T' mighty Zomjon and I seemed to simultaneously reach an apiphany moment of near biblical scale!!
It's surely pub-o/clock.
"D Na Na Na Na Na Na Na..."
D Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Pub Time!
To the bat rope Zomjon!
Meanwhile.....
Super- Steve, Clive-man and Stalking- Dave took to their heels and shot towards the Hillocks bin. via a marvalously moist wee coffin level, and the slippery bit.
Cut To the climber shaft / route.
Disclaimer:
Full instuction was glibly brushed over as we were rushing to the pub! :read:
The first time ever you climbed a rope,
I thought the sun shone in your eyes. but it seemed to be the reflection of my lamp on your fear- stained face, Steve#
I waited at the first re-belay to check technique etc'. then magically obviscate the next bit for legal reasons, not least T' croll fiddling Mighty Zomjons heroic exploits.
Suffice to say; nay praise Steve# and Gabby on a safe well managed first ascent via shiny clinky clinky things on rope.
De-rigged by T'Zomjon his self. sterling work that man.
The tale of straining custard through a brand new set of dreadlocks to sate Steves' picky picky Apple-crumble fetish is a tale for another day, and not for the faint-hearted, I do declare!
All's well that ends well eh? Easyrider by Kelham Brewery
Nuff Said?O. G.
