Sorry, but haven't you rather given the game away there.
If all it takes to be a woman is to "feel like a woman", who are you to say who feels that way? Who are you to judge what counts as "genuine" and what does not? And why does the way someone dresses matter?
I'm not, unlike some people, trying to tell people who they are or aren't. It's *their* choices, actions and decisions that matter. Why does how someone dresses matter? Well it doesn't to me, but it does to them.
Is my wife any less of a woman because she doesn't wear heels or make-up? Was my grandmother any less of a woman because she wore trousers in the 1950's and went caving?
That should be entirely up to your wife and grandmother to make their free decisions without societal pressure.
Surely you don't believe that the way someone dresses or behaves determines their sex or gender?
Gender, as generally used (see reputable sources earlier), is about social actions/choices. So yes, how someone dresses is exactly about gender, but there should be no pressure to dress a particular way due to their biological sex.
Unless you are advocating re-introducing gender stereotypes, which we have spend decades trying to break down?
Personally I think gender may be an unnecessary thing, but I'm not daft enough to think that I don't adopt one and live within unwritten rules of that gender - that's how societal expectations have formed me. I'm also not even remotely naive enough to not think that gender colours almost every aspect of our social lives, because it does. I'm also not stupid enough to think its something that's going to just disappear overnight and we'll all live in some sort of individualised utopia next week. I don't pretend to be able to know what the best solution for society is that creates maximum freedom and happiness, but I do know that telling people they can't express themselves in a particular way is probably not a good start.
The problem with gender stereotypes is that we treat people in different ways based on their gender. This is unfair, and therefore bad.
That's completely unrelated to people being free to express themselves in whatever way they choose.
You can break down harmful gender stereotypes at the same time that you let people choose to be 'themselves', whatever that
I might think a given person's choices are bloody silly. But that should be their choice - their _free_ choice, without cultural pressure and stigmatisation.
If someone wants to live their life as a 1950's stereotypical housewife, and that makes them happy, who am I to tell them they're wrong? But such choices should be truly free, informed, and open to everyone (regardless of such unimportant details such as biological sex).
Telling someone that _have_ to be a 50s housewife because they were born with a uterus - bad (gender stereotype)
Telling someone they _can_ be a 50s housewife if they want to be - freedom
Telling someone they _can't_ be a 50s housewife because they were born with testicles - also bad (also a gender stereotype, but reversed)
Basically just stop telling people how they should be living their lives when it doesn't impinge on anyone else!
PS I wasn't really happy using 50s housewife as a stereotype, but couldn't really think of a good male equivalent because of, you know, thousands and thousands of years of mostly one-sided sexism.
