• Hello From Descent

    The publication date for issue 289 is the 10th of December, meaning subscribers should receive their copies during the week leading up to that date. It is also available from caving suppliers such as Inglesport and Starless River, or from our new website

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Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
A 7 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
"You know what?" says the 7 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing."
The 4 year old nods his head in approval.
The 7 year old says "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm going to swear first, then you swear after me, OK?"
"Ok" the 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he wants for breakfast.

"Oh, shit Mum, I s'pose I'll have some Coco Pops"

WHACK!! - He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up, and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. She looked at the 4 year old and asked with a stern voice,:-

"And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"

I don't know, Mum" he blubbers,"but it won't be fucking Coco Pops."
 

AndyF

New member
Two eggs in a frying pan.

first one says "It's hot in here"

other one says "Holy crap, a talking egg!!"
 

Mr Fell

New member
It`s Friday tomorrow - with the prospect of beer and caves over the weekend - dont forget the Friday joke - rude or otherwise. I would oblige but have not been told any recently. That Wolfart has loads of gags - all non PC.
 
A

andymorgan

Guest
I came home the other night and the wife said

'have you seen my flip-flops?'

I said
'I've seen them before, now put your bra back on'
 

Slug

Member
Novice Nun: "Mother Superior, I've been told that there's a dozen cases of Syphylis in the vilage".

Mother Superior: " Thank God for that,,I'm getting Pissed off with this bloody Beaujolais".
 

Mr Fell

New member
Q What is the difference between Arthur Scargill and Michael Jackson?

A Arthur Scargill has not seen a miners helmet for years ! ?
 

Wolfart

New member
ANYONE GOT ANY TRAFALGER OR NELSON JOKES? JUST SO I CAN WIND UP THE WOODWORK TEACHER AT SCHOOL COS HE'S A STAUNCH PATRIOT AND WILL BE SPENDING THE NIGHT AT THE VICTORY INN AT HEREFORD
 

Brains

Well-known member
http://www.thehumorarchives.com/humor/0001076.html
Try him with this one, although it doesnt really sound like the Admiral to me...
 

Slug

Member
William Shakespear walks into a Pub and says, " Can I have a pint please",

The landlord says " No. You're Bard "
 

Billy Butcombe

New member
This bloke phones the council and says `Can I have a skip outside my house'. The guy on the other end says `Sure - you can dance skip hop anything' :p
 

Billy Butcombe

New member
Joke came from a student we have doing a placement :LOL: No caving came from the met office website :twisted: :evil: When I get myself into gear I can usually dredge up a good few jokes but not all are PC. :LOL:
 

Mr Fell

New member
Ah ha - Mr Butcome I presume - the co conspiritor in the disproportionate consumption of the cubic foot of Merlot no less! I can vouch for the shocking nature of your jokes - quite clean that one by your own standards ! :LOL:
 
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