• BCA Council meeting 16 July 2024

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Friday joke - WARNING - contains swearing.

Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
After £1 million worth of sex toys are stolen from a lorry in Kettering,
police say the suspects may be sitting on the evidence
and it's unlikely they'll come quietly!
 

Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
I'm not sure what shocked the postman more...
The fact that I knew where he lived or that I came to the door completely naked.
 

Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
A woman came up to me in the gym and asked if I knew which exercises would help her lose weight.
I said, "Try shaking your head from side to side."
She replied, "How often should I do that?"
I remarked, "Every time someone offers you food!"
 

Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
A man shouts to his wife, "Come here and look at my clock."
She walks in to find him naked with a hard on.
She says, "That's not a clock!"
He says, "It will be when you put two hands and a face on it!"
 

Brains

Well-known member
Following the change from the late Queen to the new King, a childrens TV company has decided to commission an updated version "The Queens Nose" where a magic 50 pence coin worked by rubbing that bit of the embossed portrait. The new series will be called "The Kings Ear"
 
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Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
Man walks into a bar with a pork pie sellotaped to his head
Barman: "Excuse me, why have you got a pork pie sellotaped to your head?"
Man: "I do this every Tuesday!"
Barman: "But it's Thursday today!"
Man: "Oh I must look a right twat!"
 

Mrs Trellis

Well-known member
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