When I lost the fingers on my right hand in a freak accident, I asked the doctor if I would still be able to write with it.
He said, “Probably, but I wouldn’t count on it.”
At the supermarket yesterday a woman smiled and waved to me. I didn't recognise her so I went over to say "Hello" and she replied
"Hello - I think you're the father of one of my kids,"
I was taken aback and struggled to recollect having had relations with her. Then the light dawned........
"Ah - were you the policewoman stripper who came to the club's annual dinner and ...er.. obliged me afterwards?"
"No" she replied, "I'm your son's maths teacher."