Author Topic: Poser  (Read 6408 times)

Offline Laurie

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Poser
« on: February 06, 2014, 11:30:13 pm »
What does the thing that's at the bottom of the food chain eat?
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Offline Dave Tyson

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Re: Poser
« Reply #1 on: February 06, 2014, 11:34:08 pm »
sunlight & co2

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #2 on: February 06, 2014, 11:50:21 pm »
Why do ballet dancers stand on their toes? Why don't they just get taller girls?
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Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #3 on: February 07, 2014, 08:10:11 am »
What does the thing that's at the bottom of the food chain eat?

Nothing; it makes the food which supports the rest of the food chain, which is why it's referred to as a "producer".

Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #4 on: February 07, 2014, 08:11:24 am »
. . . good point about the ballet dancers though!

Offline cavermark

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Re: Poser
« Reply #5 on: February 07, 2014, 09:29:58 am »
Why do ballet dancers stand on their toes? Why don't they just get taller girls?

How far could the male dancers carry a 6 foot tall girl over their head?!

Offline mm

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Re: Poser
« Reply #6 on: February 07, 2014, 09:38:37 am »
What does the thing that's at the bottom of the food chain eat?

my caving grotts

m.

Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #7 on: February 07, 2014, 11:08:39 am »
Absolutely right - if they're made of a non synthetic material such as cotton.

Offline Peter Burgess

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Re: Poser
« Reply #8 on: February 07, 2014, 11:28:47 am »
What does the thing that's at the bottom of the food chain eat?
Stuff that comes out of the bottom of things at the top of the food chain?

Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #9 on: February 07, 2014, 11:57:38 am »
What does the thing that's at the bottom of the food chain eat?
Stuff that comes out of the bottom of things at the top of the food chain?

 :lol:   . . . but not strictly true.

How far could the 6 ft tall girls carry the male dancers is the real question!   :-\

Offline cavermark

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Re: Poser
« Reply #10 on: February 07, 2014, 06:45:05 pm »

How far could the 6 ft tall girls carry the male dancers is the real question!   :-\

They could take me all the way to wherever they wanted!  8) (but they would probably just want to get me off the dancefloor before I injured someone!)

Offline glyders

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Re: Poser
« Reply #11 on: February 07, 2014, 07:17:00 pm »
Not all producers are photosynthetic (producing food energy from sunlight and CO2). Some are chaemosynthetic (producing food energy from other chemical reactions). Examples include those near black smokers (no jokes about BA and a cigar please) and in a few caves.  Those near black smokers support a rather large food chain.

Offline Roger W

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Re: Poser
« Reply #12 on: February 07, 2014, 10:21:40 pm »
And some of them at or near the bottom feed on dead 'uns from at or near the top...
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Offline Burt

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Re: Poser
« Reply #13 on: February 08, 2014, 05:42:02 pm »
when does a shoot become a sapling, and a sapling become a tree?
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Offline crickleymal

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Re: Poser
« Reply #14 on: February 08, 2014, 09:05:54 pm »
How does the man who drives the snowplough get to work?
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Offline graham

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Re: Poser
« Reply #15 on: February 08, 2014, 09:28:50 pm »
How does the man who drives the snowplough get to work?

I know the answer to that one, I've seen the advert. ;)
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Offline graham

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Re: Poser
« Reply #16 on: February 08, 2014, 09:29:16 pm »
when does a shoot become a sapling, and a sapling become a tree?

Usually on a Tuesday.
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Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #17 on: February 08, 2014, 09:49:11 pm »
42
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Offline JessopSmythe

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Re: Poser
« Reply #18 on: February 08, 2014, 10:54:18 pm »
Why do men have nipples?
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Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #19 on: February 08, 2014, 11:08:27 pm »
Why do men have nipples?
To justify owning a grease gun?
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Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #20 on: April 18, 2014, 12:03:00 am »
Why are battered onion rings in restaurants all the same size?
What happens to the rest of the onion?
How are they sorted for size?
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Offline bograt

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Re: Poser
« Reply #21 on: April 18, 2014, 12:09:05 am »
Why are battered onion rings in restaurants all the same size?
What happens to the rest of the onion?
How are they sorted for size?

I usually make bahjies out of the other bits. (or is that bargees?)
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Offline damo8604

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Re: Poser
« Reply #22 on: April 18, 2014, 12:17:58 am »
Why do men have nipples?
easy one! Because we all start out as embryos the same, our gender is only determined later in the gestation perod  but by that time our nipples are already there, like that tattoo you wished you never got

Offline damo8604

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Re: Poser
« Reply #23 on: April 18, 2014, 12:24:14 am »
Why is marmalade called marmalade and not called 'orange jam'

Offline mmilner

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Re: Poser
« Reply #24 on: April 18, 2014, 02:00:26 am »
Why do men have nipples?
easy one! Because we all start out as embryos the same, our gender is only determined later in the gestation perod  but by that time our nipples are already there, like that tattoo you wished you never got

this is absolutely true.  :thumbsup: Though  gender (in the brain) is different from physical sex at birth. (ie:- physical attributes.) It's complicated, a lot more than many people think...
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Offline kay

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Re: Poser
« Reply #25 on: April 18, 2014, 08:53:09 am »
Why is marmalade called marmalade and not called 'orange jam'

Because it should be made out of marmelo, or quince. In Portugal, marmelada is that rich and delicious quince paste that you eat with cheese, and orange jam is made with sweet oranges  and totally different to our lovely bitter tasting marmalade.

Home made jams in Portugal are different - I remember sitting down to breakfast with three homemade jams on the table - pumpkin, tomato (red tomato, not a way of using up green ones), and carrot!

Offline Fulk

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Re: Poser
« Reply #26 on: April 18, 2014, 09:03:16 am »
We've all heard the expression, 'Well, however bad it might be, there's always someone worse off'.

So, the poser – who is the poor sod on the planet 'than whom there is no-one worse off'?

Offline TheBitterEnd

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Re: Poser
« Reply #27 on: April 18, 2014, 12:44:02 pm »
Why don't they make oversuits out of that stuff they wrap DVDs in, everybody knows you cant rip that
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Offline tony from suffolk

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Re: Poser
« Reply #28 on: April 18, 2014, 01:50:11 pm »
Why is marmalade called marmalade and not called 'orange jam'

For the same reason it's lemon curd, not lemon jam.
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Offline kay

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Re: Poser
« Reply #29 on: April 18, 2014, 04:24:14 pm »
Why is marmalade called marmalade and not called 'orange jam'

For the same reason it's lemon curd, not lemon jam.

Why not lemon cheese?

But it's not the same reason. Marmalade is a jam made from oranges, misnamed after a foreign fruit name, lemon curd/lemon cheese has eggs in it and so isn't a jam, since jams should be just fruit and sugar. Jam from lemons is lemon marmalade.

Offline tony from suffolk

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Re: Poser
« Reply #30 on: April 18, 2014, 05:43:20 pm »
OK, smartypants!  ;D
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Offline damo8604

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Re: Poser
« Reply #31 on: April 18, 2014, 08:25:53 pm »
How come you never see a ghost dressed in a shell suit & trainers?

Offline cavermark

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Re: Poser
« Reply #32 on: April 18, 2014, 08:52:29 pm »
..because I'm never dressed in a shell suit and trainers!

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #33 on: April 19, 2014, 10:04:03 am »
Every ghost I've ever seen was dressed in a shell suit and trainers.
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Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #34 on: March 16, 2017, 11:17:58 am »
Rain weighs 1Kg/L, no matter how heavy it gets.
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Offline Vulcan

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Re: Poser
« Reply #35 on: March 16, 2017, 12:55:09 pm »
Because Kg/L isn't a unit of weight, its a unit of density (the mass per unit volume). Hence it can't have a weight of 1 Kg/L, it has a density of 1 Kg/L, and this would remain constant (at constant pressure and temperature).

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #36 on: March 16, 2017, 01:26:00 pm »
Awkward *%!&*!

OK, 1 Ltr of rain weighs 1 Kg no matter how heavy it gets.   :tease:

 ;)
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Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #37 on: March 16, 2017, 01:28:29 pm »
"Kg/L" isn't a unit of anything.

"kg/dm3" might be more precise. (The "3" should be superscript of course but I'm far too dumb to work out how to make it go up there!)

So, yep, one "litre" of rain (if pure) weighs 1 kg.

OK, I'll just get my coat . . .

Offline mudman

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Re: Poser
« Reply #38 on: March 16, 2017, 01:31:33 pm »
"Kg/L" isn't a unit of anything.

"kg/dm3" might be more precise. (The "3" should be superscript of course but I'm far too dumb to work out how to make it go up there!)

So, yep, one "litre" of rain (if pure) weighs 1 kg.

OK, I'll just get my coat . . .

Shouldn't that be one litre of rain at standard density and pressure weighs 1Kg?

Offline marysboy

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Re: Poser
« Reply #39 on: March 16, 2017, 01:34:00 pm »
technically speaking, kilogram is the unit of mass (not of weight)

weight is a force and would be expressed in newton

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #40 on: March 16, 2017, 01:36:11 pm »
"kg/dm³" might be more precise. (The "3" should be superscript of course but I'm far too dumb to work out how to make it go up there!)
That better?  ::)
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Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #41 on: March 16, 2017, 01:37:51 pm »
Almost right mudman - but kg not "Kg".

Marysboy is of course right.

Nice one Laurie (you clever beggar!).   ;)


Offline Vulcan

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Re: Poser
« Reply #42 on: March 16, 2017, 01:56:20 pm »
Litres are an SI accepted unit of volume equal to 1 cubic decimetre (dm3).

So 1 L of rain weighs 9.807 N at standard pressure and temperature.

Offline Roger W

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Re: Poser
« Reply #43 on: March 16, 2017, 02:07:45 pm »
So one pint (or gallon) weighs what in pounds and ounces?
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Offline mudman

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Re: Poser
« Reply #44 on: March 16, 2017, 02:13:48 pm »
Almost right mudman - but kg not "Kg".

Marysboy is of course right.

Nice one Laurie (you clever beggar!).   ;)

Damn. Out-pendanted.  :-\

And bugger, pressure, not density. Long time since my physics days.

Offline Pitlamp

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Re: Poser
« Reply #45 on: March 16, 2017, 02:28:34 pm »
So one pint (or gallon) weighs what in pounds and ounces?

 :lol:

Never mind that - it's what a pint costs that counts!   ::)

Offline RichardB1983

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Re: Poser
« Reply #46 on: March 16, 2017, 02:29:48 pm »
Awkward *%!&*!

OK, 1 Ltr of rain weighs 1 Kg no matter how heavy it gets.   :tease:

 ;)

But does it if it's actually "heavy water" - D2O?

Offline grahams

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Re: Poser
« Reply #47 on: March 16, 2017, 03:26:22 pm »
Awkward *%!&*!

OK, 1 Ltr of rain weighs 1 Kg no matter how heavy it gets.   :tease:

 ;)

But does it if it's actually "heavy water" - D2O?
The molecular weigh of water is 18 (oxygen (16) + 2 hydrogen (1)). Deuterium has a molecular weight of 2 so D2O 1s 20/18 times as heavy as H2O. (No doubt that will be contradicted by someone that knows at more than me about this subject).
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Offline mudman

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Re: Poser
« Reply #48 on: March 16, 2017, 03:41:37 pm »
Awkward *%!&*!

OK, 1 Ltr of rain weighs 1 Kg no matter how heavy it gets.   :tease:

 ;)

But does it if it's actually "heavy water" - D2O?

Heavy water has a density of 1.107 g/cm³ so 1 litre will weigh 1.107 kg

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #49 on: March 16, 2017, 06:07:24 pm »
An Imperial Gallon (of water) weighs 10 lbs.
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Offline Fulk

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Re: Poser
« Reply #50 on: March 16, 2017, 06:14:21 pm »
Ho hum,

Quote
Rain weighs 1Kg/L, no matter how heavy it gets.

And there I was, thinking it was a joke.

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #51 on: March 16, 2017, 09:21:55 pm »
Ho hum,

Quote
Rain weighs 1Kg/L, no matter how heavy it gets.

And there I was, thinking it was a joke.

......but much more fun.  ::)
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Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #52 on: February 26, 2018, 10:53:59 am »
How can it be that each year about 400,000 Americans are injured by their bedding or beds. Seriously - what do Americans do in or near their beds?
Another 40,000 Americans are injured by their clothing. Underpants haematoma? Compound pyjama fracture? Or do they just strangle each other with their clothing?
You will no doubt relieved to know that only one American was injured by a moose coming through his windscreen. No doubt the mooses (meese?) of America were also pleased.
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Offline crickleymal

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Re: Poser
« Reply #53 on: February 26, 2018, 10:57:40 am »
How can it be that each year about 400,000 Americans are injured by their bedding or beds. Seriously - what do Americans do in or near their beds?

Probably shoot each other.
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Offline shotlighter

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Re: Poser
« Reply #54 on: February 26, 2018, 12:19:02 pm »
Ho hum,

Quote
Rain weighs 1Kg/L, no matter how heavy it gets.

Only at 101.325 kPa & 20 C IIRC  (been a while since I last had to do gravimetric calibration)
  :smartass:

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #55 on: August 05, 2020, 12:53:35 pm »
Why do shoe-laces only break when you're in a hurry?
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Offline mikem

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Re: Poser
« Reply #56 on: August 05, 2020, 01:09:39 pm »
Because your children / grandchildren always tie them together...?

Offline Laurie

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Re: Poser
« Reply #57 on: August 12, 2020, 02:05:47 pm »
The Obituary Thread nearly always has a new post in it.
Must deter a lot of potential cavers who only read the headlines.... :doubt:
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